I’ve been exploring the idea of looking at people, situations, and myself as a multifaceted diamond.
According to Chat GPT:
“Diamonds are formed under extreme conditions deep within the Earth. The process
typically takes place around 90 to 120 miles (150 to 200 kilometers) below the Earth’s
surface in the mantle. Here’s how it happens:
1. High Pressure and Temperature: Carbon atoms, the basic building blocks of
diamonds, are subjected to intense pressure (around 725,000 pounds per square inch) and
high temperatures (about 2,200 degrees Fahrenheit or 1,200 degrees Celsius).
2. Crystallization: Under these conditions, carbon atoms bond in a unique
way, forming a crystalline structure known as a diamond. The atoms arrange themselves
in a tight, tetrahedral lattice, making diamonds one of the hardest natural substances.
3. Transport to the Surface: Diamonds are brought closer to the Earth’s
surface through volcanic activity. Deep-source volcanic eruptions create pipes of magma
called kimberlite or lamproite pipes, which push the diamonds upward rapidly. These
pipes are where most diamonds are found.
4. Mining and Recovery: Over time, natural erosion exposes diamonds at the
surface or within ancient riverbeds, where they are mined.
This entire process can take between 1 to 3.3 billion years!”
How amazing to consider the immense heat, pressure, and time required to form a diamond, and then a volcanic eruption to bring it to the surface! Now consider the immense pressure and fiery pain of the myriad losses we experience throughout life – the loss of loved ones and relationships, health, youth, time, abilities, opportunities, finances, homes, jobs, treasured possessions, on and on. Life is loss! Life is pain! Of course, it’s much more than that, but there is no escaping loss and grief throughout our lives.
For some of us, the losses and pain break us down. We turn to substances or excessive activities to
numb, distract, and avoid our painful emotions, thinking we can bury them and somehow be
unaffected. Eventually those substances and activities can become our master, steal our joy, disconnect us from loved ones, and destroy our lives and health.
We may get stuck in the misery of blame, anger, and resentment, ruminate on revenge, and lash out by projecting our pain onto others. The anger often brews just under the surface, and we find ourselves overreacting and blowing up when triggered.
Some of us will isolate, retreat into our shell, and build a spiked wall around our heart, determined to avoid further pain. Our emotional armor prevents us from giving and receiving love, and without love, we wither and become bitter.
Some might get trapped in the hell of our anxious minds, ruminating in endless, torturous circles about all the “What If’s,” while catastrophizing about worst case scenarios, missing the myriad gifts of the present moment, like a beating heart, the breath coming and going, and the loved ones still here.
Others of us will allow our grief to break us open as we surf the waves of shocking pain. We are willing to ask for help as we lean into terror and heartache, clinging to our faith, sanity, and loved ones. As much as we are able, we turn to healthy coping skills and self-care practices to support us through the process. We find what heals and nourishes our body, mind and soul.
Inevitably, whichever way we choose to respond to the changing tides of Life, the fire of our emotional pain, immense pressure, and passing of time will mold and carve our hearts into a sparkling, radiant diamond. And like a diamond, we each have many beautiful facets that make up the whole of us.
However, we often focus on the facets of ourselves, others, and our experiences that we don’t like or want, and therefore overlook and misperceive reality as it is. We are often too quick to assess and evaluate people, situations, and of course ourselves based upon physical appearance, physical abilities, financial status, words impulsively spoken, unhealthy behaviors, and so much more. And once we make our evaluation, our misguided and limiting beliefs become "facts" in our mind, often leading to widespread negative consequences until we are willing to question our thoughts and beliefs.
Looking through this lens, I consider the myriad aspects which make up every individual’s unique lens of perception.
Again from Chat GPT:
“Our perception is shaped by a combination of several factors, including biological,
psychological, and environmental influences. Here’s a breakdown of the key components that
shape our perception:
1. Sensory Input: Perception starts with our five senses (sight, hearing, taste, touch,
and smell), which collect data from the external world. This sensory information is
transmitted to the brain for processing.
2. Brain Processing: The brain interprets this sensory input through neural pathways,
turning raw data into meaningful information. Different areas of the brain specialize in processing various sensory inputs, such as the visual cortex for sight
and the auditory cortex for sound.
3. Prior Knowledge and Experiences: Our previous experiences, memories, and
learned knowledge strongly influence how we interpret new sensory input. These
past experiences create mental frameworks (schemas) that help us make sense of
new situations.
4. Cultural and Social Influences: Cultural background, societal norms, and
upbringing play a significant role in shaping perception. Different cultures may
perceive the same stimuli differently due to variations in values, traditions, and
worldviews.
5. Emotional State: Our emotions can affect how we perceive things. For instance,
when we are anxious, we might perceive neutral stimuli as threatening, while in a
positive mood, we might interpret the same stimuli more favorably.
6. Attention and Focus: What we pay attention to greatly influences perception. We
tend to notice what we focus on, while other information in our environment may
go unnoticed (this is known as selective attention).
7. Expectations and Beliefs: Our expectations and beliefs about the world shape what
we perceive. If we expect something to happen, we are more likely to interpret
ambiguous stimuli in line with those expectations.
8. Context: The environment and context in which we encounter stimuli influence
how we interpret them. For example, the same object may be perceived differently
depending on the lighting, background, or social setting.
All of these factors combine to create a unique, subjective perception of reality for each
individual.”
As we can see, our perception of ourselves, others, and the world is not the absolute TRUTH or TRUE REALITY.
A Course in Miracles (ACIM) teaches, “Projection makes perception. The world you see is what you
gave it, nothing more than that. But though it is no more than that, it is not less.”
ACIM suggests we don’t see the world as it is, we see the world as we are. As a result, it becomes clear that we do not have the ability to accurately judge people and situations, yet we judge nearly constantly as a function of our ego which serves to protect us from any perceived threat to safety (physical and emotional), comfort, love, acceptance, social status, etc.
When Life brings challenging people or situations to us, our ego instantly gets to work to make
meaning of it: Do we like it or not, want it or not? Is it good or bad, right or wrong? If it’s bad or wrong, whose fault is it? What labels apply? Should things be different? This is often what fills our
thoughts.
We resist what we don’t like or want, and we cling to what we like and want. And round and round we go, believing the thoughts of our protective ego and wounded inner parts, confirmed by the resulting feelings and sensations that cascade through our body. To make matters worse, we don’t often question these thoughts and beliefs, so we become ruled by them, often sabotaging ourselves from connection,harmony, and peace.
“What we resist will chase us. What we chase will resist us. Freedom is letting go, accepting,
and surrendering.” (Author unknown)
There is another way!
If we apply the diamond analogy, we can view the situation or person as a multifaceted diamond. While we may be a “subject matter expert” on one facet of the person, situation, and our ourselves, there are many other facets to explore, and in fact if we are willing to do so, we will start to realize a clearer picture. It’s a matter of widening back our lens and shifting our perspective to view other angles and facets, other possibilities we did not consider because of our default mode of perception.
I frequently share this wise quote with clients which is another beautiful way of expressing the
diamond analogy:
“There is a beautiful complexity of growth within the human soul. In order to glimpse this, it is
helpful to visualize the mind as a tower of windows. Sadly, many people remain trapped at the
one window, looking out every day at the same scene in the same way. Real growth is
experienced when you draw back from the one window, turn, and walk around the inner tower
of the soul and see all the different windows that await your gaze. Through these different
windows, you can see new vistas of possibility, presence, and creativity. Complacency, habit,
and blindness often prevent you from feeling your life. So much depends on the frame of vision
– the window through which you look.” -- by John O’ Donohue from his book Anam Cara
Ultimately, Life’s challenges serve to provide myriad, endless possibilities to become brilliant, clear,
shining diamonds, reflecting the Divinity that is our true nature. Every single one of us has a Diamond Heart within, the Heart of our Creator. But sadly, our Diamond Heart gets covered over with the darkness of emotional pain, confusion, misperceptions, and false beliefs, driven by an over-zealous ego and our wounded inner parts residing in our subconscious.
And yet, I trust and wholeheartedly believe each of us will inevitably shine again, either on this side of the veil or the other.
I invite you to practice choosing to consider all the many facets of yourself, others, and difficult
situations when you are stuck in negative, judgmental thinking by remembering that your perception
cannot be trusted and is not the ultimate Truth or Reality. There is another way to see everything, and when we choose to do so, miracles happen and peace is restored.
Jennie Anahata